Suffering for my art: new self-portrait...

[Asylum Steve]

Well, like a lot of photographers, I'm not very comfortable being in front of the camera myself... :cryin:

And while I work very hard to get to know my subjects, make them feel at ease, and assure them it's the shooter that makes the pic, not the subject, when it comes to my own image I don't believe a word of it.

So, when a local magazine I shoot for actually wanted a recent photo of me so they could run a blurb on the Create Awards I won (old news, but if you want details check my blog), it was one of my greatest fears come to life.

Now, my two choices were to have someone I trusted take a shot of me, or do it myself. In my mind that was not much of a choice, and the severe lack of trust in others meant I had to come up with a new self-portrait.

If nothing else, at least I could make sure they got the best of the worst and be in control of how bad I looked (with no surprises). And so I made it a weekend project.

Well, despite on and off rain (I used a softbox outside), and the challenge of lighting, composing, and posing (time release) without any help, I proved the old axiom that if you shoot enough frames, something's gotta come out decent.

And so, despite the incredible stress and anxiety of the event, I'm actually pleased with this shot that I ended up giving them. Something kind of moody and thoughful about it that I like.

BTW, I think my one saving grace is that I've lost about 30 lbs. this past year. Still a ways from my eventual goal, but thin enough that I feel pretty good about myself.

I know from experience that kind of thing comes through in a photo...

Oh, and a tip of the cap to our old friend photoshop...