Window and Pipe

[gahspidy]

What do you think?
Thanks

[CLKunst]

Well, if I had to guess I would say it looks like the exterior to one of your View From Within interiors. Compositionally and technically I see no issues. The lighting seems harsh though and the scene lacks a sense of mood. This image feels more documentary than commentary to me, like something that should be attached to a report about kids who vandalize equipment by throwing rocks at windows. (Hey, they missed one!) I hate to be a wisher but I think this would spark me more personally in the same scene if the vines were grown in over the shed. Then again you like stark scenes so maybe this is what you were shooting for.

[Mr Yuck]

The forum ate my original response, but in essense, I was trying to say I like the image and the harsh lighting. I also think this would look good in BW or Sepia.

[Yoyo Szeto]

Hi Gary,
I like several aspects of this shot:
1. the overall brown tone;
2. the rusty pipe echos well with the broken window and the dying grass; and
3. the rear window is the best because it make me wonder what the view of the other side will be.
I am a bit uncomfortable with the pipe because of its positioning. Thanks for sharing.
yoyo

[Loupey]

The pipe seems disjointed from the scene.

I feel that the image would be stronger with just the window/vines. I love how the vines are interacting with and encroaching upon the window (or is it the other way around )

[Seb]

What do you think?
Thanks

Well actually I like your composition and I feel that the pipe is a real bonus as it adds a strong tridimensional sense to the scene. Your color treatment is neat too. However I feel that this picture is too bright. The lighting is a bit on the harsh side but I am wondering if some more post processing (perhaps some level adjustment, or luminosity tweak or some burning or even a mix of all of the above) could lead to a darker, moodier result.

Seb

[Overbeyond]

The pipe I feel is coming too close to me and I think it unbalances things, or maybe just me, somewhat. Some greenery on the vines wouls have been lovely here. But the window itself with its holes and rusty frame is great and seeing the other window through the window is a real bonus. A little more saturation to the everywhere except the window would help a little too.
The image does not draw me in like all your other work has done, but it's still good work.
Tom

[readingr]

Gary,

To me I feel hemmed in with this picture and to me more space around the edges would have worked, unless your trying to make me feel uncomfortable then you have another success.

As the others have said a window from a window and what may be inside is excellent and the desaturated look is definitely you.

Hope the little spiel makes sense.

Roger

[Greg McCary]

I feel too it is a bit bright, mostly on the left side and the bottom of the pipe. But as far as subject and composition I really like it. The colors and textures are good and I like the way the vines move thru the image. I feel the image would be flat without the pipe. Your composition skills are top notch again, Old abandoned places like this are my cup of tea. Excellent job.

[gahspidy]

Thanks for all the comments, very helpful to understand how this presents itself to the eyes of others.

CL. . .I know what you mean about documentary as opposed to commentary. I was hoping the result would speak more to me as well.

Mr. Yuck. . .I am glad this works for you. I tried it in b&w but did not like the result, personally. The colors help warm it up a bit.

Yoyo. . .I like the things you mention as well, and also am a bit uncomfortable with the position of the pipe. thanks

Loupey. . .Yeah, the pipe was something that just did not feel right, but thought was ok. I think it is the way it angles, or seems to from my cameras perspective, down and inwards. Sort of lopsided and distracting perhaps. I think too closely cropped around it as well.

Seb. . .glad to know you like it for the most part. I don't think it's going to be very easy getting past the hard light of day look. i already warmed it up a bit and reduced the highlights. I like it for the most part, but know it can be attacked more effectively.
I went on a reshoot yesterday. Thanks

Tom. . .thanks for your thoughts. I too feel it may be too tightly framed around the pipe, making it too dominating and unbalanced, as you mention. I hit this scene again yesterday and will post the result.

Roger. . .Yeah, agreed. It feels perhaps too tightly cropped. I also like the window in window treatment and it was only an added bonus realised after seeing it when i looked at it on screen.

Greg. . .thankjs for commenting. I like the pipe in the scene but do feel i cropped it too close around it. I did a reatake and hoping it is more effective.

Thanks all for your time to comment.

[gahspidy]

Here is another take of it. I know the lighting looks similiar to the original take, but I like this composition more.
Your thoughts. . . .

[EOSThree]

You beat me to it Gary, I was going to comment "keep the pipe, but it needs more space", and that's exactly what you did. I like the composition with more room. As I do in a lot of photos here, I wish for early or late light, that would certainly change the mood, but that's hard for those of us with jobs.

[shutterman]

Gary, I like the 2nd from a comp point and the xtra little color from the grass and the window. I would probably oversaturate those two areas - but that is just a personal preference!

[Greg McCary]

I agree the pipe stays, and the crop works well. But the shadow of the pipe is a little much and it is still a bit bright. For some reason it looks as though the window has lost detail on the left side too. It's not as smooth and crisp as your usual post.
Greg

[MJS]

I can't speak for the color, since I can't see any but black, white and various grays, but, I prefer the composition of the second. The shadow on the pipe works for me. I would like to see the detail in the window from the first combined with the comp of the second. Either way, they are both pretty cool shots.

[drg]

The word that pops into my head is 'texture'. I had not thought about your photographs with that in mind quite the same previously.

There's an additional grit to this as a result of the texture for me and the brightness of the overall image somehow enhances this facet. This is the brightest photo I think I've seen from you, Gary, and it works well.

I am getting some slight sense of distortion or lens aberration. Could be the irregular mortar lines?? The pipe might root the photograph better if it had little more breathing room along the vertical edge.

[gahspidy]

EOS . . .Glad to know you think it is improved. i lke it better as well. This was fairly early morning, but still seems a bit harsh. I think the washed out brick works helps enhance that . Thanks for commenting

Wes . . . I was happy to see the blueish hues in the window and the green of the grass is from showing more of it. I like those aspects of it as well, and although i already exagerated those colors slightly, maybe a little more would be nice.
thanks

Greg . . The detail in the window will be more evident in the first as it is closer and also i think i gave the second very little unsharp mask. I do like seeing the texture and detail closer up, but i think the overall comp of the second is stronger
thanks for your time.

Micheal . . .Glad to know you are ok with the shadow. i did not quite get as much of it in the frame as I wanted, but I think it works. thanks for your thoughts on this.

drg . . .I also feel the brightness enhances the gritty texture. The first shot I think was with a Tamron 28-75 2.8 lens and the last shot was with a 17-40L 4.0 Canon. Which image were you refering to about the lens aberation and the vertical edge and pipe?
Thanks for your comments

[drg]

Gary,

I was referring to the first photograph. I prefer the closer and tighter framing except the need for a little more space on the left. The pipe coming out of the ground in the second doesn't have the same effect for me. It, the second, is straighter, but not as bright and well defined. It is not the same departure from you imagery that I see in the first.

I wonder if the aberration is merely that the camera wasn't just exactly aligned with the building at the time of exposure. I know I do that often when not using a tripod.

[readingr]

Gary,

I have been back to this several times and only now made up my mind.

I prefer the space in the second but, the composition of the windows is different and I prefer the separation of the windows in the first.

I only meant to say space on the left of the pipe not the bottom and think after seeing the latest prefer the bottom of the pipe cut off as in the first.

And lastly the colouring of the first, being the original.

Sorry to be a pain.

Roger

[gahspidy]

drg . . thanks for clarifying. Yes, the camera was surely not exactly lined up. To do that I would have to shoot it dead on with the window centered, I guess, but i want the window in the upper right of the frame. Yes, I think the original has more initial impact perhaps due to it being tighter and with more detail, but I think I'm more comfortable overall with the second comp, although I may try tweaking it just a little more for impact. I like something about each picture but it would not be quite possible to have all in one .Thanks

Roger . . .I find myself liking both images for various reasons. I also like the seperation of the windows in the first shot, and the vines seem to be more "alive". I do prefer the space around the pipe in the second and like the colors better as well. The coloring of the first is actually a warming filter I applied over the image to give it a warmer, brownish tone, the second I did not apply the filter.
Thanks

[GB1]

Hey Gary - Very interesting object. I like all the things happening here, it doesnt seem busy or anything to me. I personally love finding places like this to shoot.

What I would do to make it even better now is crop a little bit off the bottom. I dont see the reason to have that much grass area in there. I would crop off just a little below where the bottom part of the wall is, leaving about 1/4 to 1/3 of the amt there is there now.

Since I am nitpicking that is usually a good sign..........

[gahspidy]

Hey Gary - Very interesting object. I like all the things happening here, it doesnt seem busy or anything to me. I personally love finding places like this to shoot.

What I would do to make it even better now is crop a little bit off the bottom. I dont see the reason to have that much grass area in there. I would crop off just a little below where the bottom part of the wall is, leaving about 1/4 to 1/3 of the amt there is there now.

Since I am nitpicking that is usually a good sign..........

Thanks for the comments, GB. I too enjoy finding sites like these, and in this case stepped over my boundaries in trespassing on Federal property in getting shots from this location. I was busted this day too. I was lucky to be let go with a warning, so i don't think I'll press my luck in going back there. As a matter of fact, many of my latest shots,"View from withins", "weathered warriors" and others were from this area and are now boarded and off limits.

Your crop suggestion is interesting and I think i will give it a try. I don't wish to crop off as much as you suggest, as I really like the green clumps of grass, but just above the bottom of the pipe and a bit off the sides to keep the ratio that i like so much. I'll see how it goes. Glad you feel it works for the most part.
Thanks

[gahspidy]

Here is an edit with a tighter crop, taking some suggestion from GB. Also added a slight warmer overall tone. I think there is improvement, do you?