Missing Something

[PrevailingConditions]

I shot these two a couple weeks ago, but they didn't quite turn out the way I was hoping, but I'm having a hard time putting my finger on what's the problem.

On this one, I really like the floats leading up to the boats, but I'm thinking that the older boat is too dark and the background may be too busy. Yes, no?

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This one seems a little simpler and the DOF isolates it a little better, but I'm still not sure about it. I don't like the color as well as the one above. (The medium image has some compression artifacts from the website. The larger version doesn't have them)

Link to Large Size


I welcome any advice you have to offer.

Thanks,

PC

[mamajan]

When I look at these the floats are definitely what captures my attention. The boats seem almost incidental to the shot. I do think the boats in the top pic. are too dark. As for the bottom one, it is hard to pick what was intended to be the focal point. If it was meant to be the floats then I think there is too much background. I don't mean to sound so negative, I do like the subject. I also like the zig zag pattern of the floats in the top one. I'm with you on the color. Maybe a different angle or different cropping ?

[schrackman]

PC, I think the problem on the first one is simply the framing, which is too tight on the left side. I think shooting it horizontally would have given you a much better shot.

The second one I really like precisely because of the dof; however, again I think the framing would have worked better horizontally, as it seems the boat closest to the camera seems too cut off. Also, I think the time of day in which you shot these plays a part in why it doesn't feel as effective as it should. I think an early morning shot just as the sun is rising would really make the second one.

By the way, I just noticed that you're from Pleasanton!! I lived there from '76 to '81 up in the Vintage Hills area, and went to Amador Valley High till we moved to Lodi in my Junior year. Back then it was a small town, but since we moved it has grown tremendously. My sister still lives there and every other year we have Christmas in Pleasanton. If I go there this year, maybe we can hook up!

[PrevailingConditions]

schrackman, thanks for the comments. Unfortunately, I couldn't really go landscape because I was shooting between two boats and it was a shore trying to get them out of the shot as-is. I think you nailed the big issue, the time of day. The lighting would be so much better.

Yes, we've been in Pleasanton for the last 14 years. It's certainly bigger then it was when you were here, but it's still not as big as some of the other cities in the bay area. Drop me a note when you're in the area; it would be fun to meet other PR members!

PC

[Chunk]

I shot these two a couple weeks ago, but they didn't quite turn out the way I was hoping, but I'm having a hard time putting my finger on what's the problem.

Good eye to catch this subject. I like the pattern of the floats in the first shot and think that a crop to just above the railings of the nearest boat works to better isolate the subjects. Since the boat is not the main subject but just lending local atmosphere, I'm not bothered by it being somewhat dark. In fact, if it were brighter it might overwhelm the main subject.

Nice work.