First Portrait...

[jetrim]

From what I've been tought to look for, and based on the information you've given, it appears you need to move the key light (right side of photo) up about 2 feet from it's current position. This will create more pleasing/flattering shadows on the left side of the face. You'll know the strobes are positioned correctly when the shadow from the tip of the nose points at the edge of the mouth (on left side of photo) and a bright triangle is revealed on the left side cheek below the eye. This is known as "the Rembrandt effect". It will also give more pleasing catchlights in the eyes - the give away that shows the lighting setup was exactly as you described it to be

Your exposure is dead-on though!

[Sushigaijin]

I know nothing about lighting. That's a warning.

You'll get really flattering light with a single strobe placed a few feet above the camera, make sure it's diffuse. On-camera fill (-1 or -2) is good too. Put the other strobe behind her, either to light the background or to light her back.

Don't blame me, I warned you.