family feud

[barb_48]

Hi
It's been nine days since dad died, and the ******** is getting too deep for me. My brother and I are the executors of his will, which didn't make my older brother to happy. We've been running around town getting his affairs in order, my older brother really doesn't trust us so he tags along. My younger sister looks after my mother who has early alzheimer, which we are grateful. Unfortunately as time goes by she wants more and more money. So we temporarily froze all accounts as the estate planner suggested. We don't want anyone to access my mother's account without our knowledge. My sister is furious, she wants access to our mother's bank account. Lord only knows how much more of this crap I'm going to take. We were verbally attacked today by her husband, son and herself. All I have to say people, make sure your parents really spell out what they want done and by whom in their will. Than again greed is greed, and people will do anything to get their stinkin hands on money that isn't theirs.
Thanks

[Greg McCary]

Hang in there, my family came apart at the seems when my sister passed, Her sudden death created old hard feelings between my divorced mom and dad to resurface at the worst time. My sis even said "Let there be peace in my final days", but it did no good. My mom took her grief out in anger. Sometimes people show their worst side at the worst time.
Greg

[another view]

Sounds like a real mess. The only advice I can give is that there is a reason your father wanted the two of you as executors and hopefully everyone will (someday) at least respect that. Your other siblings will just have to understand that things are a little different now, and I'm sure you'll see to it that your mother is well taken care of. The fact that she (and family) are so worked up about it says something to me...

[Jacqui]

Barbara, so sorry about this horrible mess that you are in. I agree with Another View that there is a reason you were selected as the Executor. Stay true to what you know is right and let the junk roll off you like water off of a duck's back. Good luck and blessings to you.

[Frog]

I'm glad my dad pretty well spelled out what to do. The money part was easy and my sister and I sat down with the 'memorabilia' on the floor and took turns picking. Worked for us.
It is very sad that this stuff seems to happen so frequently when someone passes.
I am sorry that it interferes with your right to grieve.

[barb_48]

Thanks to everyone for their kind words. Unfortunately, my younger sister and I will never be close again. I am thinking of writing to the newspaper to find out why we as a society don't have any family values. My parents raised me as your parents did and their parents before them. Why is it, that when one of our parents needs us the most, we put a dollar sign on their care. Thanks again for understanding and no doubt probably had to deal with the same thing.

[another view]

Unbelieveable, isn't it? I've heard stories but also experienced something like that almost first-hand myself this year when my stepfather died unexpectedly this spring. He was married to my mother for most of my life so he was close - and had three children from a previous marriage. Two of the three are handling the situation as I guess everyone would hope it would be handled, but the other one, well... I'm afraid to say that this is going the same way.

Not much that really can be done - do your job in honor of your father and things may change as the years pass. You're doing the right thing.

[adina]

My great grandmother died about 6 yrs ago. Apparently, she had this nativity set that was highly coveted. Someone took it, who I guess wasn't supposed to take it, so the other siblings conspired and then took the baby Jesus out of the manger one night (outdoor set). After all, what is the nativity set without the baby Jesus.