Spring

[draymorton]

Thanks, eos. So the lips - what do I do about them?

Thanks, also, for liking the design edit. Unfortunately, it's nothing I would ever use for anything other than a greeting card. Way too '09.

[draymorton]

Okay, I think I know what is contributing to the pasted-on look. It may be the fact that there is blow-by on her cheeks, washing them out, but the corners of the lips are at more normal color density. I actually darkened the left and right edges of the lips in photoshop, but maybe I should have left them lightened slightly by the flares.

[EOSThree]

yup, I couldn't have said that, but now that you have, that's exactly it. The cheeks are a completely different color density, kind of washed out, leading my eyes to see them as a completely different object than the lips which look "in your face" bright and strong. The heavily saturated lips literally pop out from the washed out cheeks.

Yeah you're right your edit does have a certain Davinci Code look to it, but I still like it.

[draymorton]

The beauty of Photo Critique - there it is! I never would have thought there was anything wrong til you mentioned it, but you were right.

I added some artificial flare to the sides of the mouth (mimicking what the actual sidelighting would do) and, yeah, it looks a million times better.

Davinci Code? Say it ain't so!

Thanks, eos.

[Ctn]

Dray,

I have been looking at this picture a few times while on the road in Spain.

The creativity in this photo is really great and it really, as stated by others, jumps from the screen. As said, i looked at it alot and you should view the following nitpick in that light (dont know if its been pointed out earlier)

The tip of her nose is darker and more colourful than i feel it should be. It seems that you lightened her face except for her forehead and that part of her nose (the color and lightning of that tip and forehead seem the same).

It is a nitpick, but hey, its a critique forum .

Great work of art, really nice portrait

[BenWA]

As others have stated, I love this because it is so outside the box and fun. I could see something like this used in any number of commercial applications. And the greeting card[s] are fantastic, although I think I agree with Adamo that the second card edit might make her look dirty and some kind of in-between of the first edit and second edit would be best. Really like these a lot.

[draymorton]

Thanks ctn and BenWa.

Ctn - great critique. I think I did exactly that. And evening out the tones and lightness would be a good idea. It's details like those you've mentioned that we often miss because we're too close to our own work.

BenWa - Thanks. I was hoping to use this (second edit) as a portfolio piece, hence my looking for tips on fine-tuning here.

The card I ended up sending was somewhere in the middle of the two edits and (I think) it was somewhat well-received.

[Photo-John]

Sick! Love it! The original, I mean. I like the other variations, too. But I love the crazy, unnatural colors in the original. You did a really great job of setting this up and I think the yellow lipstick really ties it all together. I also think your composition is perfect. I am really at a loss when it comes to offering any useful criticism. One thing I can offer is, in the variations, don't lose the color. The color is what makes the original shot. In the second variation, where there's no color, the image just doesn't have the power that the others have.

Wonderful. Glad I got to see this one

[draymorton]

Awesome, thanks John! Very glad that you liked it. Something very different for me - all setup, minimal pp (on the original, anyway). When you have a face like that, who needs Photoshop?

Yeah, I thought the b/w would work - and I was very excited about it at first - but you're right: this image is all about the colors.

Thanks again!

[Photo-John]

Happy I could offer something. It's nice to get in this forum to mix it up every once in a while