Cherry

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  • 03-02-2010, 12:38 AM
    Shebang
    1 Attachment(s)
    Cherry
    I'm putting this one up here for your critique on my composition and focus and dof, etc. -- anything but lighting -- which is straight sunlight without any artificial light. I guess that's a Studio/Lighting issue. I know that horrid line has gotta go. I shot this with my 17-40 and got some distortion on the jar. So I straightened it but I think I created other issues by doing so. What do you think?

    Thanks for any input.
  • 03-02-2010, 01:02 AM
    hminx
    Re: Cherry
    Is nice,.. not sure I like the lid askew though... perhaps ..... hmm....nah its fine....:)
  • 03-02-2010, 06:09 AM
    Grandpaw
    Re: Cherry
    I don't do these kind of shots but would like to make a few comments. I think the spoon needs to be in the jar. This would get it off the plate where it just blends in. Also I think the piece of bread needs to be bigger and placed where it shows up better instead of blending in with the pattern on the plate. Not sure but I think the lid should be in the picture laying on the table upside down instead of on the jar. This is just my opinion and it is coming from someone that has no experience in this type of shot, Jeff
  • 03-02-2010, 06:42 AM
    jetrim
    Re: Cherry
    Much better than my first attempt! The thing is, these shots are all about detail and nuance. The spoon creates a great leading line to the jar, but the orientation would work much better if the scene were reversed starting low with the spoon handle on the left and working up to the jar label on the right. The lighting is very even which is good, but it also looks like it has a substantial Magenta cast which is not. If you get a large piece of poster board, you can tape it to the table and let it roll up the wall, eliminating the line in the background (you can use it to set your white balance too). I also think I'd like to see the lid leaning up against the side of the jar at a 45 degree angle, rather than askew on top (use a piece of scotch tape to hold it if you have to) and as Jeff also mentioned - more bread! Great attempt though!
  • 03-02-2010, 08:01 AM
    gahspidy
    Re: Cherry
    Great attempt here, Paula. I agree with Jeffs comments as well as Jet. They offer some good points to consider. I aree that thepiece of bread should be larger, and perhaps smeared with jelly. Instead of a spoon I'm feeling a knife/spreader would work better.
    The lid could be better positioned, but does not really bother me here. I too see a magenta cast over the image, which could be removed by going into lelvels and selecting your White eyedropper and clicking on a part of the area that should be white. That should remove it and balance the colors.
    I like the focus here, and feel it works but you could also try focusing more towards the front of the plate and see what it loos like with sharpness fading a bit towards the jar.
    always nice to have options and choices.
    Good work, Paula.
  • 03-02-2010, 09:15 PM
    daq7
    Re: Cherry
    I guess you are getting better input from the more experienced shooters, but for me this is very nice. This kind of shot wants to minimize shadows which you have done. DOF may be a bit too shallow since you don't want the spoon and the plate blurry. But very nicely done over all.
  • 03-02-2010, 10:46 PM
    GB1
    Re: Cherry
    I see the cup half full here Paula. I like the simplicity of the shot, the color (a throwback to the Victoria age maybe? ), the way the lid is cracked open. The two objects work well together IMO.

    Areas for improvement: technically, the whole image should be in focus, so I don't care for the way the front of the plate is fading out. Did you have a tripod? You might have been limited by your light source as to what f stop you could get away with. The image compression is set too high, as I see a lot of artifacts on my monitor. Artistically I think the angle of the lens could be different, though I'm not sure what. Not sure the back wall being as it is that close to the objects is ideal (maybe ..). I'd give it a little more neg. space at the top. Maybe more reflection in the plate too? All is hindsight, of course!

    G
  • 03-02-2010, 11:05 PM
    Shebang
    Re: Cherry
    Thanks everybody! Great tips, and I really, really appreciate the help.
  • 03-02-2010, 11:16 PM
    Frog
    Re: Cherry
    You weren't happy with the line when you posted this in project forum but I rather like it there.
    Gives dimension or something.
    I like this shot very much and only suggestion I have is that there could just a little separation
    between the plate and the jar. Looking some more, I'd also like more crumbs on the plate.
    Love the colors.
  • 03-02-2010, 11:26 PM
    Shebang
    Re: Cherry
    Thanks, Frog!

    It's late and this is the first time I could get back here today, but tomorrow I will reread everyone's posts and see what I can come up with -- hope I get sun tomorrow.

    Thanks again, all!
  • 03-03-2010, 08:38 AM
    Grandpaw
    Re: Cherry
    paula, remember that all of the comments are just suggestions. I would try some of each of the suggestions and see what combination works best for what the look you are trying to achieve. That is the beauty of placing a photo in the Critique forum, you get many different points of view from a variety of experience levels and styles
    . I always look at a photo first and see what I like or what I think would look better and then after forming an opinion I read the other points of view and often discover things I hadn't noticed or thought about. The whole process is a way to learn how to improve and it has helped me a lot whether it is suggestions about one of my photos or someone else's, Jeff
  • 03-03-2010, 09:24 PM
    Shebang
    Re: Cherry
    Thanks, Jeff. I'm deciding that part of my struggle is I don't know what I'm trying to achieve. I'm still trying to find my "thing." Looking through the eyes of another is certainly thought provoking - sometimes sparking a whole new direction altogether.
  • 03-04-2010, 06:26 AM
    kisu
    Re: Cherry
    I cannot comment on the technical aspects of the shot but do agree that the front of the plate should be in focus. To me there seems be a clash between the subject matter and the background - I look at the image and think that the jam jar and plate should be sitting on a old wooden kitchen table with warm natural light rather than than the rather 'clinical' white background.
  • 03-07-2010, 07:54 AM
    shootme
    Re: Cherry
    Comp is fine for me. I like how you have the top of the jam jar off, nice detail. I'd have added possibly more contrast. DoF is fine for my liking.
  • 03-07-2010, 01:15 PM
    srblough
    Re: Cherry
    Maybe try a dab of the jam on the bread? And / or move the bread so it has more of the white plate behind it? As it is for me the bread doesn't stand out enough from the plate pattern behind it.

    Agree with others that the lid ajar is a nice touch; could add a little more "realism" if there was also a touch of jam up on the rim of the jar.
  • 03-07-2010, 07:45 PM
    Shebang
    Re: Cherry
    Good call, kisu! Thanks, shootme and srblough! Life is currently in my way.