When chemists die, they barium.

Jokes about German sausage are the wurst.

How does Moses make his tea? Hebrews it.

I stayed up all night to see where the sun went. Then it dawned on me.

This girl said she recognized me from the Vegetarian Club, but I'd never met herbivore.

I'm reading a book about anti-gravity. I just can't put it down.

I did a theatrical performance about puns. It was a play on words.

They wrote me that I had type A blood, but it was a Type-O.

PMS jokes aren't funny; period.

Q) Why were the Indians here first?
A) They had reservations.

We’re going on a class trip to the Coca-Cola factory. I hope there's no pop quiz.

When you get a bladder infection urine trouble.

Broken pencils are pointless.

I tried to catch some fog, but I mist.

What do you call a dinosaur with an extensive vocabulary? A thesaurus.

England has no Kidney Bank, but it does have a Liverpool .

All the toilets in New York 's police stations have been stolen. The police have nothing to go on.

I got a job at a bakery because I kneaded dough.

Velcro — what a rip off!

A cartoonist was found dead in his home. Details are sketchy.

Venison for dinner again? Oh deer!

The earthquake in Washington obviously was the government's fault.

Be kind to your dentist. He has fillings, too.

Woman found dead in Bathtub covered with Cheerios, obviously a cereal killer